Mastering Interpersonal Skills: Key Strategies for Personal and Professional Success

Boosting your interpersonal skills is a great way to improve various aspects of your life.

In this article, we’ll look at what interpersonal skills are, some examples of how you can use them, why they are important and how to improve them.

What are interpersonal skills?

You use interpersonal skills every day to interact with other people. They are the abilities and qualities that enable you to interact effectively with others in personal and professional contexts.

Interpersonal skills encompass many things and, as you’ll see, they are interconnected. Here are some of them:

Verbal and non-verbal communication abilities: verbal communication involves what you say and how you say it. Non-verbal communication is everything you say without words. Body language and tone of voice are examples.
Emotional intelligence: this means understanding and managing your own emotions and those of others. It involves many other interpersonal skills, including empathy and active listening. It allows you to build stronger, more meaningful connections with others.
Empathy: this interpersonal skill involves fully concentrating on and comprehending what other people say, picking up on non-verbal cues. Attentive, empathetic listening enables you to respond appropriately and build stronger connections with other people.
Active listening: when you fully concentrate, understand, respond to and remember what someone says, you have actively listened to them. Active listening deepens connections and promotes mutual understanding – crucial for effective communication and relationship-building. It’s also vital in conflict resolution.
Conflict resolution: a key skill for leaders, conflict resolution involves addressing disputes peacefully, understanding diverse perspectives and finding mutually acceptable solutions. It promotes cooperation, strengthens relationships and cultivates a positive environment, which is essential for productive interactions.
Negotiation, persuasion and influencing: negotiation seeks mutually beneficial solutions, persuasion convinces others to see your perspective and influencing shapes other people’s behaviors or decisions. Together, they enhance communication, promote cooperation and help you achieve what you want from your interactions.
Teamwork: this skill involves collaborating effectively with others, valuing diverse perspectives and working toward common goals. It requires communication, cooperation, trust and conflict resolution. The ultimate goal is for groups to achieve more together than they would individually.
Leadership: good leaders inspire trust, encourage collaboration and navigate challenges effectively. They drive team success and create a positive, productive environment. Leaders need to guide and motivate others toward common goals. This skill requires effective communication, empathy and decision-making.
Reliability: this is the ability to consistently meet expectations and commitments, building trust and dependability in your relationships. Reliability demonstrates respect for others and helps establish a foundation of trust. It’s a vital trait for leaders.
Positivity: maintaining an optimistic and encouraging outlook isn’t always easy, but it enhances morale and resilience in various situations. A positive attitude can help create a supportive and uplifting environment. It promotes better relationships and makes others feel valued and appreciated.

Interpersonal skills are the foundation for building and maintaining successful relationships in all aspects of life. They allow individuals to express themselves clearly, understand other people’s perspectives and work together harmoniously. This leads to more positive outcomes, no matter the context of your interactions.

Examples of interpersonal skills in use

Let’s look at some real-life examples of how you might use these skills in various workplace situations:

In a team meeting: an employee in the meeting uses active listening skills to understand their colleagues' ideas and concerns fully. They then clearly articulate their own thoughts, building upon the team's collective knowledge and fostering a collaborative atmosphere.
During a conflict: a manager employs emotional intelligence to empathize with each employee's perspective, acknowledging their feelings without judgment. By actively listening to both sides and communicating clearly and calmly, the manager facilitates a constructive dialogue that leads to a mutually agreeable resolution.
While mentoring: a senior team member demonstrates reliability by consistently honoring their commitment to mentor a younger employee. They create a supportive environment by offering specific, constructive feedback and encouraging the mentee to ask questions and share ideas, ultimately fostering the mentee's professional growth and strengthening their relationship.
In customer service: a customer service representative approaches a challenging customer interaction with positivity and empathy. They actively listen to the customer's concerns, validate their feelings, and maintain a calm, professional demeanor. By communicating clearly and working towards a solution, the representative turns a negative situation into a positive customer experience.
Networking events: an employee attends a networking event and demonstrates strong interpersonal skills by engaging in balanced, meaningful conversations. They actively listen to others, ask thoughtful questions, and share their own experiences concisely. By focusing on building genuine connections rather than dominating discussions, they create lasting, positive impressions that expand their professional network.

By applying interpersonal skills in these situations, employees can foster a positive work environment, strengthen professional relationships, and achieve better outcomes.

How do you demonstrate interpersonal skills?

Most organizations are well aware of the value of interpersonal skills. If you can demonstrate to an employer that you have these skills, you'll increase your chances of getting or keeping the job. Not everyone knows how to demonstrate these skills, however. In this section, we'll show how to do so in a variety of contexts.

In a resume

A resume provides you with limited space and opportunity to demonstrate your interpersonal skills. Focus on specific achievements that illustrate your competency in these areas. For example, highlight instances where your communication skills helped a project succeed or where your leadership contributed to team achievements. Phrases like "facilitated team meetings to enhance project alignment" or "resolved cross-departmental conflicts to maintain project timelines" showcase your interpersonal skills.

In interviews

If you've gotten past the resume phase and are going into an interview, you'll be under scrutiny from the moment the interviewer greets you. The next few minutes will be a strong test of your interpersonal skills. Make sure to make the impression count. Use positive body language and make direct eye contact. Answer any questions asked of you clearly and concisely, taking time when necessary to organize your thoughts to ensure you articulate them well. You'll be asked about past experiences at some point in the interview. Give examples of how your ability to work well with others has produced positive outcomes. You might use the STAR framework to help this process:

Situation: Describe the specific situation or context in which the event or challenge occurred. This helps the interviewer understand the background and sets the stage for your story.

Task: Explain the task or responsibility you had to accomplish within that situation. This clarifies your role and the expectations you had to meet.

Action: Detail your specific actions to address the situation or complete the task. This is the most important part of your answer, as it showcases your skills, initiative, and problem-solving abilities.

Result: Conclude by describing the outcome of your actions. Quantify your results whenever possible to demonstrate the impact of your efforts. Also, highlight what you learned from the experience and how it has influenced your professional growth.

In the workplace

This is perhaps the easiest way to demonstrate interpersonal skills. You're in the workplace five days a week. When you're at work, your interactions with colleagues are displayed for everyone to see, including those in management positions. When you actively listen to colleagues, communicate clearly with everyone, and constructively participate in meetings, you're demonstrating to everyone in the workplace that you possess great interpersonal skills.You can take this further by demonstrating a calm and solution-oriented approach to conflict resolution and taking the initiative to support and mentor new team members. This will demonstrate leadership qualities and a commitment to team success.

Can you learn interpersonal skills?

Not everyone is naturally gifted with strong interpersonal skills, which may lead some people to question whether these skills can be acquired. Fortunately, interpersonal skills can indeed be developed and improved, regardless of one's natural abilities. While it's true that some individuals may have a predisposition towards certain skills, everyone has the capacity to enhance their interpersonal abilities through practice and dedication.

One way to develop interpersonal skills is by participating in educational programs and workshops that focus on specific areas such as communication, conflict resolution, and leadership. These structured learning environments provide individuals with the knowledge, tools, and techniques needed to improve their skills in a focused manner.

However, interpersonal skills can also be developed through everyday interactions and experiences. Activities involving collaboration with others, such as team sports, group projects, or customer service roles, can provide valuable opportunities to practice active listening, effective communication, and problem-solving skills. The key is to consciously focus on applying and refining these skills during these interactions.

To successfully develop interpersonal skills, individuals must prioritize self-awareness and reflection. By consistently analyzing one's own interactions and seeking feedback from others, individuals can gain valuable insights into their strengths and weaknesses. This knowledge allows for targeted improvement efforts and continuous growth in interpersonal skills over time.

How to improve interpersonal skills

For those who want to improve their interpersonal skills, here are some other ways to consider:

Self-assessment and feedback

Improving interpersonal skills is an ongoing process that starts with self-assessment and feedback. Several assessment tools can help you identify your strengths and weaknesses in communication, empathy and teamwork:

360-degree assessments: Gather feedback from colleagues at all levels to comprehensively assess your interpersonal skills.
Emotional Intelligence (EQ) assessments: Evaluate your ability to recognize and manage emotions in yourself and others.
Personality assessments (e.g., Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, DiSC): Gain insights into your communication style and preferences.
Self-assessment questionnaires: Reflect on your own interpersonal skills, such as active listening and conflict resolution.

Feedback from colleagues is invaluable, as they can provide insights based on direct interactions with you. However, both self-assessments and feedback require honesty and openness to be effective. By genuinely reflecting on the results and committing to self-improvement, you can identify areas for growth and take steps to enhance your interpersonal skills.

Training and workshops

Training programs and workshops can be instrumental in developing interpersonal skills. These often involve role-playing activities, group discussions, and interactive sessions that allow participants to practice new skills in a supportive environment. Depending on the interpersonal skill you want to develop, these courses may be in-person workshops that help you practice speaking in front of others and working with them towards a common goal or online courses from platforms like Coursera or LinkedIn Learning.

Practical tips for everyday practice

To hone interpersonal skills, daily practice is required. Setting personal goals, such as initiating conversations with colleagues or managing conflicts more effectively, can drive improvement. There are also tools available that can help. Reminder apps or journaling can help document and reinforce your goals. For tangible guidance, Pip Decks offers specific tactics for common interpersonal challenges, such as resolving disagreements or communicating more effectively in team settings. Making these cards a part of your daily routine can provide quick, accessible advice that complements other strategies. There are also plenty of helpful books on communication, behavioral psychology, and other topics that can improve your interpersonal skills.

Pip Decks

Mastering interpersonal skills: unlocking success in your personal and professional life

What are interpersonal skills?

Examples of interpersonal skills in use